Two Worlds
“He came to me in the middle of the night, like always. There was no hello exchanged, no easy transition from sleep to sex; most often I woke to the most wonderful feeling in the world, of being inside my lover”s mouth, and only knew what it was when it was over.
He moved over me, pausing to lick my chest a few times before his hot mouth settled over mine.
I gave myself to him, all of me, as he spread my legs and settled between them. I gasped when he entered me, sobbed when he insisted on moving slowly, moaned when he hit my prostate, screamed when it became too much, sighed when I lay there spent, insensate, not even fully comprehending what was happening, only that it was. Didn”t even realize who was doing this to me until his weight lifted from my bed and I could hear the ruffling of clothes.
“You could at least hold me once, you know,” I murmured into the darkness, making little effort on my voice being heard.
“Sorry, babe,” I could hear weariness in his voice and immediately wanted to jump up and make him feel better, even though my mind was already slipping back into unconsciousness.”
~*~*~
“Jonathon? Jonathon!”
I snapped awake and looked around, giving a sheepish smile when I realized where I was. “Sorry Maria, couldn”t sleep last night.”
“It”s starting to happen too often. What is this, the fourth time this week?”
I winced and looked at my full plate of chicken salad. “Sorry, love, just a lot on my mind these days.”
“Like what?”
I shrugged.
“Oh, god, Jonnie, tell me already! I”m getting tired of you shutting me out!”
“I”m not shutting you out,” I said while giving another shrug and picking up my fork to pick at my food.
“Jonnie, in all the years that we”ve been sister and brother, this is the first time that you have shrugged instead of told me the truth, and you”ve been avoiding this discussion for the last month!”
“Maria, just don”t,” I muttered, my voice practically fading into nonexistence.
She sighed, and I knew that I”d won. “God, Jonnie, this is really getting to me. Just, snap out of this soon, okay?”
“Yeah, okay.”
I”ll try, I told myself.
~*~*~
“I dimly felt the sensation of being lifted and then, “Wake up.”
I moaned and cracked open bleary eyes. “Wha-” The rest was cut off when I was set on my feet and shoved chest first into the wall.
“I”ve been meaning to try this for a while,” he whispered into my ear, his warm breath tickling me.
I stepped back, yawning, shook my head when I heard the sound of the cap to the lubricant bottle being unscrewed. My mind drifted and next thing I knew, he had gripped my hips and was in me. I brought my hands up to keep my head from smashing into the wall. This time, he gave me the mindless, hard fucking that I”d been begging for.
My body lit on fire, every nerve ending open for stimulation, the slightest wind from his breath had me shivering. I could feel him pumping away inside me, burning me from the inside, branding me as his.
I felt as if I was opening, as everything inside me began to sing with the oncoming orgasm when he pulled out completely.
My whole body was tense and tears rolled from my eyes as time stood still. I could hear his harsh breathing from somewhere behind me. I couldn”t even feel his hands anymore.
A click.
A flash.
He was back inside me.
I screamed with release.”
~*~*~
“Jonnie?”
Her. I looked up and then down immediately. I couldn”t deal with her, couldn”t look at her, couldn”t hear her voice. It was too painful.
“Jonnie?”
Why did she have to be so persistent?
“Jonnie?”
“What, Cassandra?” I snapped.
She frowned at me. “I”m having a small dinner party at my house, I was hoping you could come.”
“Cassandra,” I sighed her name.
“Oh, god, Jonnie, this little spat between my husband and you has gone on long enough! We were becoming friends, but when you met Rick you pulled away completely! Well, I”d really love to be your friend, and I will be, despite your objections. Now, you better be at there!”
“Or you”ll what?”
She stared at me and she shook her head. “I was really hoping that working in a real company would be different than high school, that the people there would be adults. Thank you for reminding me that I”m just the geek in the corner that nobody wants to talk to!”
She stalked away and I buried my head in my hands.
~*~*~
“”That”s you?”
“What?”
I lifted my head from the pillow and blinked at him, wondering what he meant and why he was still there.
“This is you.” I felt something thrust into my hand. I turned on the light and froze when I saw that it was a photo. A photo of me. Dimly, I recalled the click and flash of the night before, but it had disappeared from my mind when he had left.
I was standing, my body bent like a bow string, my eyes clenched tight, my mouth open, my body glistening with sweat. Everything about my body was accented, especially my erection, darker than the rest of me, pointing straight to the ceiling.
“You can”t see my scars,” I murmured.
“No, you look healthy and at your peak,” he said.
I can hear the amusement in his voice, but I ignored it as I reveled in me, for once finding myself attractive.
“Why did you give it to me? Why did you do it?” I asked him.
He came close and nipped my chin. “Your low self-esteem annoys me.”
“Funny, you haven”t heard me put myself down in a while.”
“Yet it”s there. I wanted something of you to carry around, and most of all wanted a photo. I”m giving you the copy, figured you”d at least admit that you look amazing for once in your life.”
I rolled onto my stomach. “Yep, I definitely look fine.”
He sighed. He knew I wasn”t saying what he wanted me to say.”
~*~*~
“You weren”t there.”
I looked up at Cassandra and raised my eyebrows. “Wasn”t where?”
“The dinner party.”
“Don”t tell me you”re surprised.”
“Ugh, what is it between you and my husband anyway? He refuses to talk about it.”
“Well, then I will as well.”
“Oh, god, when was it that you two knew each other?”
“High school.”
When I was first realizing what I was.
“Oh my god, that was so long ago! Why can”t you just move on?”
Because what he did ruined all of my future relationships. As soon as the thought entered my mind, I blanched.
“Jonnie? What is it, Jonnie?”
He had said that I”m amazing, even knowing what was there. He was still there.
“Jonnie?”
“Nothing, Cassandra, go back to work.”
~*~*~
“I could feel his mouth on me, swallowing me, there to bring me to desperate peaks of arousal so he could play with me.
But I wasn”t into it.
“Why do you do this?” I whispered.
He immediately stopped and pulled himself from me. My mind hardened itself against the pleas of my body.
“Why do I do what?”
“You know.”
“No, I don”t. I”ve yet to know just how your mind works. Tell me, what is it that I do that you don”t like?”
I didn”t say anything.
“You don”t like the way I fuck you? What? I”m not big enough for you?” he was sneering now, I could feel him over me, taut, all male, perfection, and probably all for slugging me.
“That”s not what I mean.”
“What? You don”t like that I don”t take you out? Not spending any money on you? Hell, even if we could be seen together, I wouldn”t take you anywhere. Why should I be associated with you, you lowlife piece of-”
I reared up and slammed my hands into his chest. His arms closed around me as we tumbled onto the floor, him on the bottom. “Finally,” he gasped, and dragged my head down to his.
His kiss seared my soul and his hands seared my body as he swept them over my back, my butt, and into my crack. I pulled away from him and managed to spit out, “What were you-” before I howled with pleasure as he plunged two fingers into me and found my prostate.
“I think my interrogation skills are fine, don”t you?” he muttered into my neck. “I”ve gotten you to admit that you don”t think that low of yourself, even if not verbally.”
I opened my mouth, probably to curse him out, but my intention was lost as he flipped us over to return to what he had been doing earlier.”
~*~*~
It was a week later that I was working late, repeating that one phrase over and over in my mind.
“Jonathon?”
I turned to see my boss, James, standing outside my cubicle, frowning at me.
“What?” I asked, frowning when I realized my voice was weak.
“I”ve heard of overtime, but this is too much. It”s midnight.”
I glanced at the clock by my computer and shook my head, “I just have to finish this,” I said around a yawn.
“It can wait “til tomorrow.”
“No, it can”t,” I said, shaking my head.
“Oh? When”s it due?”
That made me pause, and it took a few seconds for me to come up with the answer. “In two days.”
“Then it can wait. You”re one of my best editors, Jonathon, I don”t want anything happening to you. Is everything all right at home?”
“No.”
“Oh? What”s the problem?”
I opened my mouth, then caught myself. “Wow, I must be really tired,” I muttered to myself, then spoke up, “It”s nothing I can”t fix myself.”
“You do that.”
In the back, some newscaster repeated part of a story she had told earlier, “Apparently, the police were called when a van in front of the building blew up. They appeared in time to arrest the Hessia gang, but not without a fight. Five cops were injured while Two of the Hessia gang died immediately and four were transported to the hospital where one died in the van. Unfortunately, two of the Hessia gang have escaped.”
~*~*~
“”Look at that, new meat.”
I turned to see what my friend had been talking about, and found it. A middle-aged man was standing in front of the doorway, looking around. He was shaking his head and even I could see that he seemed a bit nervous.
“Think it”s a closet case?” I asked.
“It”s definitely a closet case. Um, time to break him in.”
Drake slid from his seat and began walking toward the newcomer, and I took in his appearance, feeling myself harden when seeing how built he was, and the ample package between his legs. His face was okay, not much to look at, a nose with freckle dusted over them, an ample mouth, pale skin, and light brown hair with golden highlights. It was his eyes that really captivated me. They were brown, but really light, almost honey. They seemed to glow when they fell on me.
Drake walked up to him, and the eyes flickered from me to him. They talked, but it all stopped when the stranger nodded at me and Drake turned around to give me a grin. He walked back to his seat, taking the man with him.
“Jonnie, baby, looks like you got an admirer,” Drake said in a sing-song voice
I gave the man a smile, but I didn”t know what else to do. I attracted attention with my bright green eyes and blonde hair and my slight build wasn”t bad, but I had never really returned the attraction, always wondering what they”d say when they saw my legs. I stuck to people who”d disappear after sex, but I had a feeling this guy would show up again.
He leaned forward and whispered, “Don”t like what you see?” into my ear.
“That”s not it at all,” I whispered back.
A hand crept up the inside of my thigh, “Then how “bout we get together?”
“How “bout not?”
He licked my ear, sucked briefly on my earlobe, and I melted.
“You sure?”
“No.”
He didn”t speak in the car, and I didn”t ask him anything. It occurred to me right as I walked into my apartment that I didn”t know his name, but that faded away when he came in after me, slammed the door shut, then slammed me against the wall and began to kiss me.
It was only when his hands roamed too close to my legs that I began to return his assault. I pushed my hand beneath his belt and smirked when it closed around him. He threw his head back, and then unbuckled my belt and his knees buckled. We fell to the floor, and he whispered, “Lube.”
“Suck your fingers and stick them in me,” I whispered.
He complied quickly and efficiently, and soon enough I was face down on the floor with a man that I”d considered shy pounding away on top of me and giving me rug burn like never before.
Afterwards, he dressed immediately, gave me a quick kiss, and left. And returned the next day.”
~*~*~
“Johnnie, I think you”re sick.”
“Mind your own business, Maria.”
“Oh, come on, you”re walking around like a zombie. What”s the matter with you?”
“Nothing”s the matter with me.”
“Oh, please, that”s is such bullshit. Did a guy reject you?”
“Oh, come on.”
She rolled her eyes. “I really wish you”d go for more than one night stands.”
“I don”t need a relationship to survive.”
“Yes, you do.”
“Why?”
“Because you have someone that will share your burdens.”
“And I”ll have to share their burdens.”
She sighed. “I really love you, Jonnie, I just wish you”d let others do that, too.”
“I have.”
“What? Three times? God, ain”t it nice that the few times you decide to open up, you do it to such jerks.”
“Maria.”
“What? It”s the truth. Your idea of opening up is a few dates and then sex with the light on, and that just doesn”t cut it for some men, and you seem to go for those kind of men.”
I remembered him and shook my head. “No, not really.”
She read something about that and her eyes lit up. “Oh, my god. Tell me everything!”
“I don”t want to.”
“Why?”
“Because it”s over.”
~*~*~
“”Why are you handcuffing me?”
“Because I want to.”
I sighed. “Should you really be using these handcuffs? You wouldn”t get in trouble, would you?”
He chuckled and made sure I couldn”t get out of my position; sitting in a chair with my hands handcuffed to the wooden legs. Naked.
He unbuttoned my shirt slowly, pausing to lick my chest as every inch of skin appeared. I was writhing on the chair when he began to pull my pants off. I froze, but it was too late. He had already seen. He had my pants off in a second.
“So this is why you insisted on the light being off,” he murmured, looking at my legs.
My face was turned away. “Let me go,” I whispered.
“No.” He kissed my knee and my head snapped to him, my eyes searched his, desperate for any sign of betrayal. I couldn”t let this stranger, this man who only let me know what his profession and current predicament was, this man that wouldn”t even tell me his name, be the one to finally get past my defenses. I needed a well rounded man, not one that could disappear on me one day because someone in his life suddenly put him on a leash.
“Why did you come back?”
“That night?”
“Yes, that night.”
“Because you were a hot fuck.”
His crude language had me gasping, especially when he sucked my big toe into his mouth.”
~*~*~
Cassandra walked into my cubicle, but I didn”t want to acknowledge her. I didn”t need any more invitations.
“Jonnie, I am so sorry.”
Everything stopped. I turned around to see tears glistening in her eyes.
“Cassandra,” my voice was barely a whisper.
“I made him tell me and he told. I am so, so sorry.”
“Cassandra, it”s not your fault,” I reached out to hug her and the tears spilled.
“But, I married him! My god, I didn”t know he could do such a thing!”
“Cassie, we were young, foolish, he could have done anything back then.”
“Except act maturely?”
“Cassie.”
“It”s true.”
I shook my head.”
“I just, I just wanted to say I”m sorry, Jonnie. If there”s anything I could do.”
“There”s nothing, Cassandra. I”m sorry about this. We might have had a wonderful friendship, but, unfortunately, I can”t.”
“I understand.”
~*~*~
“”I was in a car.”
He lay beside me, still. He didn”t know what I was talking about, why I had started talking. For some reason, he had stayed the night, for the first time, but I had no doubt he wouldn”t be doing it again. That he wouldn”t even have a choice.
“I was heading toward my grandmother”s house and other cars appeared in back of mine. They began to bump into mine, and I tried to get ahead. Suddenly, they pulled down their windows and began screaming things like “faggot,” “cocksucker,” and then I remember this one guy, he had his car be brought up in front of mine while I desperately tried to get mine away. He did it so easily; his car was a better model, newer, built for speed, mine was a dump. He threw a beer bottle at my front window. There was a crack, and stuff splashed all over it. I crashed into a tree. The whole front of the car caved in, ruined my legs. The doctors say I”m lucky to be walking.”
He didn”t say anything, just looked at me. I could feel his eyes on me. When I turned my head toward his, his golden eyes glowed with unshed tears.
“Because of that guy, I can”t be friends with a really wonderful woman. Because of that one incident, he”s going to be married to a woman that will feel like she doesn”t really know him. And because of him, you”re the first man that”s remained with me after learning of them. Thank you.”"
~*~*~
“Wow, this Hessia thing”s all over the papers. It”s all anyone”s talking about. Everybody”s wondering which of the friends was the leak. My god, can you believe it? These people killed hundreds of children, and they were arrested because of a leak.”
I scowled at my food, and Maria nudged me. “Didn”t you hear a word I said?”
“Yeah, I did.”
“Well, anyway, did you hear that one of the four injured guys died on the way to the hospital? My god, it”s horrible. There”s a picture of him lying on the gurney. Gosh, isn”t it a shame, he”s so handsome.”
I didn”t glance at the picture. The image was already seared into my mind.
~*~*~
“”Funny.”
“What is?”
“You never fuck with the windows open or lights on.”
He glanced at me, and then sighed. “I don”t want anybody to see.”
“Like who?”
“The wrong person, that”s who.”
I rolled my eyes.
“Listen, babe, I may seem cautious, but there”s more than my job that”s on the line.”
“It”s just, you didn”t seem that affected by … it … it”s okay if you are.”
He punched me and then grabbed me, pulling me into a hug, burying his head into my shoulder. “You fucking idiot, it”s not that, god, it”s not that. It”s not that, it”s much bigger than that. I love your fucking legs, especially when they”re wrapped around my waist.”"
~*~*~
“So, why haven”t you been on a date for three years, Jonnie? Maria”s getting real worried about you!”
“I know, Ma, I know. She”s told me.”
“Baby, I know it might be harder to meet cute guys when you”re gay, but surely there are some online things. God knows, Eric”s been raving about the people he”s met online.”
“Eric”s thirteen, Mama, don”t let him do that.”
“Why? He”s promised not to say where he lives, his real name, and that he won”t meet any of them, so why bother? He”ll do it anyway.”
I smiled. “You”re wonderful, Ma.”
“Course I am, now tell me, why is it that you aren”t dating anyone.”
“Because I fell in love.”
She squealed. “Really? To who? When? Why haven”t you told anyone? My god, I could spank you for this, boy!”
“He”s dead.”
She immediately quieted down. “What happened?”
“Remember all the goings on about the Hessia gang a few years ago?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, he was one of the so-called friends that died the night they were arrested.”
“You fell in love with a felon?”
“No, Mama, I fell in love with a cop working undercover. He was the leak.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah, oh. I love you, Mama.”
“Are you going?”
I tried to swallow the lump in my throat. “I”ve got to.”
“Okay, bye then, baby.”
“Bye.”
It was when the phone clicked off that I moved on. I looked around myself. My apartment was a mess. For three years, I had relived my memories of him, and that time, over and over in my head, just loving him more, but I had finally told another of him. Of my cop. Of the man with golden eyes and no name. I can finally move on.
~*~*~
I left the trench, moving quickly through the pre-dawn. My body still throbbed and quivered from what had just passed. The sun was nearing the horizon when I reached my home, slipping in the door and moving quickly down the stairs to my private room. I reached my bed, barely slipping out of my clothes when the piercing sunrise caused all functions to cease. I had no recollection of my body landing on my bed.
Far too early, I was awakened by the sound of mortar fire. I had only been down for a couple of hours. I strained my ears, listening for more shells, but there was none; at least none nearby. In my head, I could hear the explosions. I felt the heat and raining dirt. I could smell cordite and loam. What was happening?
My senses spread out from my body, so I could look around. The sunlight was so bright; I wanted to shield my eyes. My mind turned, and there was Ethan, his face dirt smudged, his uniform torn. Panic filled me. Why was I seeing Ethan? What was I doing in this field?
After searching my mind, wondering what had happened, the memory of last night sparked some reason. I had tasted his blood. The three drops I had taken from him must have bound him to me and I to him. I was stuck inside his mind, his fear, and his adrenalin; perhaps even his memory of last night had called to me. There was a clamor amongst the soldiers and my senses took over, searching out over the field. Mustard gas! I could see it coming over the dead zone. I spun my senses to Ethan. I had to make him understand.
Put your gas mask on! I called out to him, willing him to hear me through the new bond we shared. I shouted it over and over. After the third time, I watched as Ethan paused and looked down at his belt, at the mask. All my senses drew together, willing Ethan to believe in me, in what my powers were telling him. Countless moments passed as I watched him grab his mask and cover his face. Mere seconds later, the cloud of noxious fumes covered the field and obscured my vision of him.
Caleb? His disembodied voice came to me softly, hesitantly.
Yes Ethan? My heart was pounding, overwhelmed with new and what I had thought were long dead emotions. He never answered me. Not until Ethan had returned to the base camp did I sever our connection and try to go back to sleep. It was a wasted effort. Every primal instinct in my body demanded I go to Ethan. But until the sun disappeared from the sky, I was bound to my dank chamber. I had never hated the prison I was in before that day.
Never before had I ever risked the light of day, but I stood at the door’s threshold, watching the last few rays of sunlight fade. Once the tingling in my spine ended, I left, moving swiftly through the night. One other bonus of our being bonded, I could sense Ethan from miles and miles away.
I didn’t see anything that I walked through. Not the forest. Not the dead soldiers lying in the field. Every sense in my body was tuned to Ethan. I drifted through the night, searching for him. Before long, I knew he was near his camp, standing amongst the trees. I walked up behind him, whether I said his name aloud or in my mind, I couldn’t say, but he turned to me.
We came together in a flash of raw need. Arms entwined, I buried my lips against his pulse, letting my hands wander over him, making sure he was unharmed. My fingers felt irritated skin against his wrist and burnt skin at the nape of his neck. As we sank to the ground with our hands skimming over each other’s bodies, unbeknownst to me, my powers reached out and healed the chemical burns on Ethan’s body.
As I plunged myself into Ethan’s body, the bond between us opened, and I could feel all that he was feeling. I was given double the sensations of our coupling: what I always felt during sex, and now what Ethan was experiencing as well. It was the most erotic feeling I had ever known. His body surrounded me, fisting me in pleasure, but I also could feel Ethan and his pleasure; his absolute pleasure.
After it was over, we lay on the ground, holding each other, staring at the moon. I lost count of the number of times I found release inside him that night. Each time seemed to bind us together stronger and deeper. When we parted just before dawn, it was with a promise to return the next night. We met every night, just outside of his camp, over and over again.
As April faded into May, there was a large battle. Many men lay wounded and dying on the battlefield. Their pain and suffering called to me. All I could do was dream of Ethan, but their torment overrode my desire for my man. Pulled between my two halves, I waited for sunset, and then I set out for the battlefield intent on stopping their pleas.
It took hours as I went from man to man, German, French, British, and American, it didn’t matter. I ended their torment, draining their pain as I took their life force. I was kneeling over the last one, letting my powers calm the scared boy, when I felt his presence. I wanted to hurry, I didn’t wish for Ethan to see what I was. In my haste, the young French boy felt my fangs sink into his neck. His panic overwhelmed me and I worked harder to calm him. I had taken his last heartbeat into me when Ethan came across us.
The bond between us roared to life, throwing me into the maelstrom of his emotions. Fear; gut wrenching, confusing fear rippled between us. I watched in extreme sadness as he turned from me and fled into the night. My seldom-used heart was breaking in two as I sat, trying to decide to go after him or return to my lair. All I had to do was remember the two of us together, and I was on my feet and using my superhuman strength to run after him, overtaking him quickly.
I didn’t temper my strength as I grabbed his shoulder, spinning him around. “Ethan, wait.”
The look of raw fear in his eyes could have ripped me in two. But my man was always courageous. His voice may have trembled, but he found the courage to talk to me. “What are you?”
I swallowed around the lump in my throat, blinking back the unfamiliar and unwelcome moisture in my eyes. “Does it matter?”
Incredulity sparked in his eyes. “Hell yes it matters!” He kept blinking his eyes rapidly and his face was flushed. “I worried about you when you didn’t come to the camp.” He swallowed. “I’ve fallen…” His voice trailed off.
Frustration filled me, and I did the only thing I could think of. I kissed him. All my frustration, fear, and hurt went into it. Except for that first night, we hadn’t kissed since. His taste filled my senses; the texture of his mouth overwhelmed me. Without meaning to, my fangs scraped his bottom lip and his precious life’s blood filled me. I tasted his fear and confusion. What seared my heart was the pain and hurt. Underlying it all though, I could taste love. It was a foreign and long unfamiliar sensation, but my body recognized it, blossomed with it. My need for him was great, I wanted so badly to take him in my arms and love him through the night. But the sun would rise all too soon.
I broke the kiss, pulling away from Ethan. His golden hair shone in the moonlight. His lips were bruised and passion filled. I stepped back, moving slowly away from him. “You have no need to fear me, Ethan.” I was about to turn away from him, when his voice halted me.
“What you are, it’s nothing but a scary story told to kids.”
I turned back and smiled, letting my fangs show. “Not all stories are make-believe. But I mean you no harm.” Hope forced me to continue, to make myself vulnerable to this mortal man who had captivated me. “Think on what you feel today. I’ll be back to the camp after sunset.” I swallowed audibly with what I was about to do. “If you are not there, I’ll never bother you again.”
With those last words, I fled into the night, moving as quickly as I could to my sanctuary. When the sun rises, my death is compulsory. My longevity as a vampire allows me to wake early. This day, it was barely an hour after sunrise when I awoke. All I could feel through our bond was his confusion and indecision. If I knew more about my powers, if I had had an instructor, I might have known how to comfort, perhaps even ease his anxiety. Instead, all I could do was feel his torment.
The coming summer and the increased sunlight made the time before I could go to Ethan unbearable. Thankfully, I wasn’t helpless underground. There were things I could do. I grabbed candles from my storeroom and placed fresh linens on the bed. At some point during the long day, I had decided that if Ethan were waiting for me, I’d bring him to my home, my sanctuary.
Once I moved away from my mill, I let my senses go, searching through the countryside for the life signature of Ethan. When my senses came upon the field hospital, I wanted to shy away, lest their plaintive call for an end to their suffering pull me away from my mate. It was strange, but in the five hundred years since I had become a vampire, I had never once taken a partner. When I was young to my immortal life, I had been drawn to others like me. I looked in large cities, and the first of course being Paris. But their decadent life and disregard for the humans they fed on quickly drove me away. I knew from my observations though, that I could bind myself and in the process bind to me a human. He would draw from my powers and I from his vitality, increasing his lifespan and decreasing my own. For if anything happened to one, the other would perish as well. Fear alone, plus lack of prospects had kept me from considering it. But with Ethan, for the first time, I felt more than bloodlust and sexual hunger. I had never known love before, but this felt very much like it.
The initial attractors were his life force and his inner beauty. But it was his strength; his own feelings for me that had made my own emotions explode. I had barely left the stream bank when I could feel Ethan in the distance. My feet moved swiftly over the ground, as if they knew every branch, every rock and avoided them. In mere moments, I was standing in the trees, slightly away from the American army camp. I stood under the trees where we had made love that second time. There I waited. And waited. And waited.
After an unknown amount of hours, after watching the shadows and silhouettes of the tents, there was a rustling behind me. I turned and found Ethan, looking down at his feet, shamefaced. He shrugged his shoulders, as if he were unburdening himself then looked directly in my eyes. “I’m sorry I was late, I had night patrol duty.”
Relief made my chuckle almost hysterical. “It doesn’t matter. You came. That’s everything.”
Ethan placed his hand in mine and we left the trees, moving towards my mill. My powers reached out and included him. We moved fast, avoiding obstacles in our path. Within minutes we were crossing the stream and entering my home. I led Ethan down the stairs, past the old grindstone into my private chambers.
Once I shut the door to my room, I moved around my space, lighting candles. My own senses were sharp, but tonight, I wanted to see all of my love. Once the last candle was lit, I turned to find Ethan staring at me. Then I realized he hadn’t seen me except in shadows. I moved slowly towards him, feeling my blood boil as he continued to stare at me in an almost feral, hungry way. I watched as he swallowed.
“You’re very pale Caleb.”
I chuckled and touched his arm, feeling electricity spark between us. “I haven’t seen the sun in over five hundred years.”
The embarrassed way he rolled his eyes and blushed charmed me deeply. I had known he was tall, but in this room, with the stark candlelight, he was almost larger than life. I reached out to him and began to unbutton his jacket and Ethan returned the favor on me. Once we stood before each other naked, I spent many long moments drinking in his frame.
He was muscular, but not overly so. His shoulders were very broad. From head to toe, the man was covered in a light blonde fur that once touched, proved to be as soft as down. Ethan possessed an outer beauty, now that I had finally seen it that simply took my breath away. All the time I spent looking at him, feasting him with my eyes, he did the same to me. He swallowed deeply before placing his hand to my chest, running his fingers through the wedge of hair there, scraping over my nipples, causing me to gasp loudly, because of which he dropped his hand. I took it in mine and kissed his knuckles before pulling him towards me, back to the bed.
I lay back against the sheets and pulled Ethan on top of me, taking his lips with mine. His body shifted so it lay fully on top of me, his erection pulsed and leaked against my thigh. Our difference in height made it obvious in what I intended. Except for the night I became a vampire, I had never allowed someone else to enter me. This night though, I was giving myself to Ethan, to cement the bond we shared.
I slipped my legs around Ethan’s hips, wiggling a bit to center him, pressing my own aroused flesh hard into his belly. He then looked down into my eyes, bracing himself on his arms, and trembled in excitement. As he began to press into me, I pulled him by the back of the neck and kissed him deeply as I felt the loud rumble of his moan as he slipped inside me. Ethan lowered to brace himself on his elbows, framing my face in his big hands as he began to move.
Arching my back against his chest, I cried out as he slipped in and out of me swiftly but not roughly. My hands became restless as I scratched up and down his back. I watched as his breath began to pant and his face beaded with sweat, all the while his grin and soft moans told me of his pleasure. My own body reached for release and I heard my own cries of joy as he filled me, over and over again. As he reached his peak, I kissed him again, tasting his pleasure, his rapture on his heated breath. It swirled inside me, adding to my own pleasure as I cried out, emptying my seed against his belly.
We collapsed into a pile of sweaty, entwined limbs as we kissed each other gently, tiredly. I stayed awake for a long time, watching Ethan as he drowsed. Finally, I had found my mate. Once he woke, I would ask him if he would bond with me permanently.
Once I felt the first tingles of dawn’s approach against my spine, I gently roused Ethan. He yawned and grinned big as he grabbed me, kissing me deeply. But I had so little time to tell him. I pushed him away gently, even though I could feel his desire pressing hard against my belly.
“Ethan, when the sun rises in a few minutes, I will sleep. You will not be able to rouse me.”
He seemed a bit confused but nodded his understanding. I could feel the sun, nearing the horizon. “After a few hours I will wake. We need to talk.” I had mere seconds left. My limbs grew sluggish and my eyes were drooping. “Don’t…” I never got a chance to finish, as the sun broke free of the horizon.
I awoke, confused and disoriented. It was near sunset. I hadn’t planned to sleep so late. I looked around my room, searching for Ethan. I opened our bond, but couldn’t locate him in my home. That’s when I noticed his clothing was gone. I reached out with all my might, searching for his life force.
Standing in the middle of a battlefield, with mortars exploding all around, was Ethan, dragging a fallen comrade towards the safety of their own lines. My mind shattered with fear. All my control slipped as every doubt and petty fear ran through my mind. Why had he left? Why did he go back? Will he come back? Over and over it swamped my mind.
I could only dress in frenzy, going out of my chambers, ready to flee across the fields to my mate. I couldn’t cut off the images of him, dodging bullets, dragging his friend to safety. The sun would set soon, I could go to him, bring him back and bond with him. A few minutes before sunset, I doubled over in pain as fire lanced my belly. I wasn’t hurt. But my mind was filled with pain and horror as I watched Ethan sink to the ground, grasping his middle, where a bullet had caught him.
Willing all my powers over the weak link we had, I begged for him to be okay, long enough for me to reach him and share the link with him so he could be healed. I had never risked the sunlight before, but I stood at the door, letting the last rays burn into my skin. The moment the sun sank below the hills, I ran. I pushed myself harder than I ever had before. I used all of my powers, focused only on the weak heartbeat of my mate. The troops had moved north during the day, I was further away from Ethan than I had ever been before.
Hours seemed to have passed when I finally made it to the battlefield. I combed over the bodies, searching for a beloved face. His heartbeat was getting weaker; I could feel him slipping away. The search seemed to take hours, but probably only lasted a few minutes. Then I found him, lying facedown in the mud, his beautiful golden hair caked with dirt.
Not even thinking of his pain, I rolled Ethan over. His sharp cry tore at my heart. All I wanted to do was seal the bond and save him. His heart was starting to beat erratically. We had little time left. I wiped the dirt off his face, cupping his cheek in my hand. “Ethan! Ethan!”
He choked on some blood dribbling from his lips. “I’m so sorry Caleb.”
The anger and recrimination didn’t matter anymore. “Don’t. Don’t speak. It’ll be okay soon. I’ll take you home. We’ll be fine.” I didn’t realize tears streamed down my face.
He tried to lift his arm to my face, but it fell back to the ground. He started coughing. I willed all my powers into him, trying to heal his wound. But it was too late. “Don’t leave me Ethan. Please.”
His smile was fading fast. There was no time to seal the bond. Ethan was going to die. “I love you Caleb. I’m sorry I have to leave you.”
I shook my head, sobbing loudly. “No… don’t leave.”
Ethan laughed a little, and then winced from the pain. “I don’t have a choice in this. I love you Caleb. Always.”
The pain was so great, but I swallowed my anguish. “I love you too Ethan.”
He smiled at me, and then with the last of his strength, he grabbed my hand. “Make the pain go away. Please.”
Horror shook me. “No… please no.”
Ethan tilted his face away, baring his neck. “Please Caleb. I hurt so bad.”
The tears doubled, trickling into my mouth. I had no choice. “I love you Ethan. Always.” Then I lowered to his throat and called his pulse to the surface, using my powers to calm him, let him feel my love. My fangs sank deeply into his neck and I drank of everything that I loved. His goodness. His purity. His love. His undying, everlasting love for me I tasted. I had never once known someone else’s love before.
In less than a minute, Ethan died in my arms. I felt his last breath against my arm. When it finally sank in that he was gone, I bellowed all the hurt and anguish I had ever felt, both my own and my victims, into the night sky. I know not how long I screamed my anger to the moon, but once my voice was ragged, I crushed Ethan’s body to me, cradling it as I wept.
I seriously considered staying where I was to let the sun turn me into cinders. My pain would end with the rising of the sun; it would be over. I couldn’t do it. When the night sky started to purple with the impending dawn, I set Ethan down and left through the dark, back to my lair. Once back in my sanctuary, I lay back on my bed, still filled with Ethan’s scent, and let dawn’s oblivion take me away.
I didn’t leave my mill, let alone my room, for thirteen years. The only thing that did make me was the undying hunger I felt. I would have gladly let my life end, but the hunger won out. The world’s economy was in tatters and it was worse for the peoples of Germany. I headed out and feasted on the poor, malnourished and starving until I had gorged myself.
Over the next few years, I followed wherever war and strife would take me. I was hollow inside. My only source of comfort I had was easing some poor, lost soul out of his miserable existence on earth. The only difference was now I simply used my powers to calm, not seduce. Because once I had known what true love was, no simple act of sex could compare.